Posted By: Shopprice New Zealand
Tired? Stressed? Not feeling sexy? Here are 7 tips to help you get in the mood.
Remember the days when sex didn’t seem like a chore? Those blissful nights when you couldn’t wait for a roll in the hay with your significant other? If you find that sex is falling to the bottom of your to-do list (you’re far too busy, too exhausted and run too thin by everything else on your plate), you’re not alone. We asked Dr. Lisa Paz, a marriage and sex therapist, for ways to get in the headspace for sex in 10 minutes or less. Read on and get ready to do the deed.
1. Put on lingerie. “Women’s desire is highly correlated to body image and their subjective self perception of being sexy,” says Dr. Paz. “Lingerie serves as a concrete and effective queue that it’s time to get in the mood, sort of like your fabulous workout leggings help you gear up for your workout.” When you’rechoosing lingerie, it all comes down to the colours and styles that make you feel the most confident. Men are attracted to your confidence over everything else, so instead of asking your hubby what he likes, trust your instinct and go for something perhaps you normally wouldn’t.
2. Have a bit of “me” time. “Masturbation prior to sex, helps us get into the headspace of our fantasies and our erotic triggers, especially if you don’t let yourself climax. “You can transfer that energy over when it’s time to hook up with your honey,” says Dr. Paz.
3. Get groomed. “Women need to feel that they are sexy and hygiene is a big part of this,” says Dr. Paz. She suggests having a hot shower and shaving before you hop into bed with your partner. If you have time earlier in the day, you can also get groomed at a local wax bar, many of which pride themselves on being able to do a five-minute Brazilian (removing all the hair down there). When you know you’re fresh, clean and stubble-free, you’ll feel more confident and in tune with your body.
4. Use your imagination. “Think of all the things you love about your lover,” says Dr. Paz. “Women are more able to get into a headspace for desire if they feel amorous and connected to their partner. Take a few minutes to think about what’s so amazing about him or her.”
5. Tidy up. Yes, a clean and organized space helps women stay focused on the sexy time and not all the other stuff they have to get done, like laundry, cleaning and paying the bills, says Dr. Paz. You’re not going to be in the mood to get down if your head is everywhere but there. Pun intended.
6. Set the mood. “Light a candle and put on mood music. Little details like this help you feel like this is special and sexy,” says Dr. Paz. When you change the setting from your usual bright lights and the TV on in front of you, you change the tone.
7. Welcome erotic fiction. No matter how much you want to bond with your partner, it’s normal to get distracted. To get your sexy back, Dr. Paz suggests reading your favourite passage from a naughty book (think Fifty Shades of Grey). “Have a few surefire paragraphs of sexy literature highlighted on your e-reader so that you can steal a few minutes to read it and get your head in the right place before your body has to catch up.”
Looking for more sexy ideas? Get tips to refresh your relationship with your partner here.